If you reblog a lot of:
can you reblog this please? I’m trying to find new blogs to expand our dash, even if yours isn’t reblogging it for your followers would be greatly appreciated!
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching a street performer do some excellent juggling. The juggler notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he stands up on a large wooden box and calls out, “Can you all see me now?”
Took me about ten minutes to finally understand this
stupidest/most awesome joke ever
That is a horror that may never again be recreated.
photobomb from beyond the grave
okay but when you flip it you get
HAYYYYY GURLLLL WHERE THE PARTY AT
this website i swear
The Lion and The Rose.
I’m at that awkward age where half my friends are engaged or having babies, and the other half are too drunk to find their phones.
You know, funny story: There’s this craft store called Michaels. Look, my sister knits, and she goes to Michaels. So my sister called me and she’s like, “Oh my god, I’m at Michaels, picking up yarn. You have a poster at Michaels.” I’m like, “What?” She’s like, “There’s a poster, there’s a Falcon poster at Michaels.” I’m like, “Holy s**t!” She’s like, “I’m gonna come and pick you up, and we’re gonna see your poster in this store.” So she picks me up and we go to Michaels.
We go in, and I see the poster and I’m like, “Oh, this is….” She’s like, “I know, I know.” I said, “I’m gonna sign these posters.” I was like, “That would be amazing, you buy a poster and it’s like, actually signed by the Falcon.” Like, it would blow my mind. So I go to the front, I buy a Sharpie, I run back to the back of the store. And she’s like, “I’m gonna take a picture of you signing it.”
I’m in this store and I’m signing all the posters. The manager comes out, he’s like, “Hey, whatcha doing?” I was like, “Oh man, I’m signing these posters so when people buy ‘em, they’re signed.” He’s like, “Well, people are not gonna buy ‘em if they’re signed.” And I was like, “No, no, no, it’s cool. I’m pretty sure there won’t be a problem.” And he goes, “Yeah, but it is gonna be a problem, you’re messin’ up my inventory.” And I’m like, “No, my man, trust me. I mean, I’m the Falcon, that’s me!” And he goes, “Yeah, right. You’re gonna buy those posters.” I said, “What?” He’s like, “You’re gonna buy all those posters or I’m gonna call the police.”
He rolls up all the posters and goes to the front of the store. And I had to buy like 60 Falcon posters that I signed in Michaels." - Anthony Mackie getting in trouble for signing his posters at a Michaels (x)
The guy who has no idea how brooms work:
This guy that is pretty sure he was just kicked:
This guy who has no control over his arm movements:
9 has no time for your philosophizing.
nine is tired of your crap
Nine was the sassiest.
I don’t think I’ll ever be able to scroll past this gifset without reblogging.
Can we also appreciate Rose please? She’s like his back up sassyness and being all “Bitch please, not today.”
is that simon pegg
yes. yes it is
you can have FOUR
“So my friend gave her rabbit a cherry” … - Imgur
the best thing I have ever seen.
When someone randomly calls you cute and you just
that thin ass chocolate bowl would never be able to withstand the pressure of my spoon trying to slice ice cream
WHAT IS THE FUCKING POINT
YOU COULD BE A FUCKING BADASS DRAGON THAT’S THE POINT
"I AM A CREATURE OF DARKNESS" "oh hey sabrina."
I guess the point is that you could shapeshift into the body you always thought you’d grow into when you were a kid
taller, shorter, slimmer, more muscular, purple hair, tattoos everywhere, tattoos nowhere,
every single shoe would fit you every single time you tried it on, every single article of clothing would fit your perfectly, all you have to do is transform slightly, you’d never run out of ‘your size’ again
and you wouldn’t have to work for it at all, and you’d never be limitted by your bone structure or something. You could just transform at will.
I don’t see how this is much of a downside
When you turn into a sixty story tentacle demon and terrorize a city you want to get the credit you deserve
Oh man that would be so sweet. I could be an annoying fuck as an insect or something but you couldn’t kill me because everyone would know
I would be so scared too.